Starting my countdown....

Well around this time I start my countdown on looking back on the year and thinking about what I want to do in the new year. It's hard to believe at times that with the start of the new year. Orlando and I have been together for 4 years and married for a year. Everyday I wake up and just am amazed at the relationship we have. I think about the past and how I never thought that I would get married and how my longest real relationship was like 6 months. I just thought I wouldn't find anyone that I wanted to stay with for a long time. Then Orlando came and my life as I knew it was over. I'm so happy and content with life and him that nothing is stopping me. Now on to my countdown. This year has been a year. I love my life and my husband, but the one thing that I would like the most is to become a mother. We have been trying for one year. And hopefully soon I will be a mother. I'm just so stressed most of the time and just want things to happen when I want it to happen. This TTC journey has shown me alot of things that I want and probably need to work on. For one the stress. Orlando always tries to help me not be stressed, but I'm just so use to being stressed. Well I realized that the stress is causing me to get sick more and the stress is not good for me TTCing so now I'm taking his advice. I'm really proud of the fact that this summer I just relaxed and wasn't stressing. It's like I have this whole new world now that I have reduced my stress. I'm enjoying my life and not getting as sick. The other things is just being patient. I like everything right now and that didn't happen for me to be a mom. So I'm having to just let things happen. I took a TTC break for about 3-4 months so that I could get everything together with myself. Now that I'm trying again it just feels so relaxed and calm. I'm not thinking negative about anything and I'm reading about things to help me understand and know what else I can do. I know that I will have to probably take some type of medicine to help me which I don't mind, because I know sometimes you need extra help. But now I'm starting to think about goals for next year. Of course one of the goals is to be a mom. The other goal is to keep enjoying life and relax. Orlando says I don't know how to relax and he is right. But I'm learning to relax. And want to enjoy married life even more. This next year it's all about me. I have been doing for others and pleasing others and now it's time for me to do for me and my family. Well that is it for today.